TRUST EACH OTHER

“See everything. Correct a little. Forget most.”

This quaint bit of good advice to parents is good advice also to husbands and wives. That relaxed point of view comes close to hit- ting the right balance between a restrictiveand a permissiveposition. It calls for a large measure of trustin our relationships with one another — including, of course, the marriagerelationship.

There is a popular poster that shows a child letting a bird go to the sky. The caption reads,

“Let the bird go. If it comes backto you, it’s yours. If it doesn’t, then it was never yours in the firstplace.”

When you trustsomeone, you allow a long leash because you are confident that you need not controlthat person in order to demonstrate proof of love. As a grandmother once said to her grandson,

“Don’t hug the kitten too tightly. It might scratchyou and then run awayfrom you.”

Trust is never a matter of control, of…