PARENTING DEFINITIONS DUMBWAITER:
One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert. FAMILY PLANNING: The art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster. FULL NAME: What you call your child when you’re mad at him. GRANDPARENTS: The people who think your children are wonderful even though they’re sure you’re not raising them right. HEARSAY: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word. INDEPENDENT: How we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say. OW: The first word spoken by children with older siblings. PRE-NATAL: When your life was still somewhat your own. PUDDLE: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it. SHOW OFF: A child who is more talented than yours. STERILIZE: What you do to your first baby’s pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby’s pacifier by blowing on it. TOP BUNK: Where you should never…
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