HUSBAND PRESERVATION
The Chicago Tribune, on October 1, 1994, reprinted a letter to Ann Landers that included a recipe called “How to Preserve a Husband.” Here’s a copy for those looking for a new dish: How to Preserve a Husband First, use care in selection. Get one that is not too young, but tender and healthy. If you choose one recklessly, it may not keep. Don’t put in hot water. This makes them turn sour. Sweeten with smiles, and spice with patience. All varieties will respond. To ensure a wonderful consistency, stir gently over a low flame and don’t leave unattended for long periods of time. To add a delicious flavor, sprinkle generously with praise and appreciation. The poorest specimen may be improved if you follow these instructions and will keep for an unlimited number of years in any climate. Ann Landers offers an additional suggestion: “Frequent exposure to cold temperatures has been known to damage this dish permanently. Keep a small, steady flame…
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