Chemical Abuse | Evangelism | Humor | Ministry | Opportunity | Politics

THE RESCUE MISSION
Reverend Elton “Salvation” Jones Dear Friend, Perhaps you have heard of me and my nationwide campaign in the cause of temperance. Each year for the past fourteen, I have had a tour of Colorado, Kansas, Minnesota, and Iowa delivering a series of lectures on the evils of drinking. On this tour i have been accompanied by my good friend and assisstant, Clyde Linnon, a young man of good family background. Clyde is a pathetic example of life ruined by excessive indulgence in whiskey and women. Clyde would appear with me at the lectures, sit on the platform drunk, wheezing and staring at the audience through bleery and bloodshot eyes, sweating profusely, picking his nose, passing gas, and making obscene gestures while I would point him out as an example of what indulgence can do to a person. This summer, unfortunately, Clyde died. A mutual friend has given me your name, and I wonder if you would be available to take Clyde’s…

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