THE FOOTBALL SERVICE
Quarterback Sneak: Church members who quietly exit following the Lord’s Supper, a quarter of the way through the service, or near the last quarter of the service. Draft Choice: Selection of a seat near the door. Draw Play: What too many children and some adults do with the attendance cards and bulletins. Halftime: Between Bible School and Worship. Benchwarmer: Those whose only participation is their attendance on Sunday morning. Fumble: Dropping a songbook, singing the wrong verse and general inattention during the service. Backfield in Motion: Making two or three trips out of the worship service. (Public schools don’t allow this.) Stay in the Pocket: What happens to a lot of money that should go toward the Lord’s work. Two Minute Warning: When the preacher begins extending the invitation, giving everyone time to shuffle books and gather belongings. Sudden Death: The preacher goes overtime. Blitze: The stampede for the doors after the service. Halfback Option: When 50% of the congregation does…
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