Complain | Criticism | Humor | Perspective | Preaching

Results of a computerized survey indicate that the perfect pastor preaches exactly 15 minutes. He condemns sin, but never embarrasses anyone. He works from 8 a.m. until midnight and is also the janitor. He makes $60 a week, wears good clothes, drives a new car, and gives $50 a week to the poor. He is 28-years-old, has been preaching for 25 years, is wonderfully gentle and handsome, loves to work with teenagers and spends countless hours with senior citizens. He makes 15 calls daily on parish families, shut-ins and hospitalized patients, and is always in the office when needed. If your pastor does not measure up, simply send this letter to six other parishes that are tired of their pastors too. Then bundle up your pastor and send him to the church at the top of the list. In one week you will receive 1,643 pastors. One of them should be perfect.

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