Sermon Illustrations

MONEY AND EXPERIENCE When a person with experience meets a person with money, the person with experience will get the money, and the person with the money will get some experience. Leonard Lauder, CEO of…
I.R.S. POLICY When you consider the taxes the average person has to pay, the IRS seems to have a policy of "handicap the hired." Funny, Funny World
HYBRID Did you ever hear about the student who was a follower of both theologian Paul Tillich and Evangelist Billy Graham who was asked to pronounce the benediction? He said: "And now may the Ground…
AWAKE YOU SLEEPERS Did you hear about the cross-eyed discus thrower? He didn't set many records but he sure kept the crowd awake."
IMPOSSIBLE Never tell anyone it can't be done . . . God may have been waiting for centuries for somebody ignorant enough of the impossible to do that very thing. J. A. Holmes
SUFFERING The highest joy to the Christian almost always comes through suffering. No flower can bloom in paradise which is not transplanted from Gethsemane." Ian MacLaren as quoted in Christian Communication Laboratory
PLANNING FOR OLD AGE Children are a comfort to you in your old age -- but like your IRA it's nowhere as much as you expected. Funny, Funny World
OVERHEARD In Pastor Seeking Committee Interview . . . "We see our pastor as one who primarily administrates, enables, coordinates . . . and scrapes the pigeon droppings off the steeple." Doug Hall cartoon, Leadership
PRIORITIES OF A REALIST Want ad in a country newspaper: "Farmer, age 36, wishes to wed woman about 30 who drives tractor. Please enclose picture of tractor." Chestnuts, Freshly Roasted
GETTING RICH It's easy to get rich. All you have to do is invent something that costs a dime to make, sells for a dollar and is habit forming. Funny, Funny World
CREDIBILITY In the cartoon Herman, by James Unger, we see the husband handing the phone to his wife and saying "Here . . . tell your mother we're out. She won't believe me."
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