The new pastor of a small Church in the Tennessee hills was a dedicated teetotaler. Consequently, he was deeply disturbed to learn that several men in the congregation were operating illegal stills. He tried to persuade them to mend their ways and close down the stills, but without success. Finally, with the entire congregation assembled for the New Year’s Day service, he announced his intention to take decisive action. “I have made the following New Year’s resolution,” he said: “Be it resolved that tomorrow I shall journey to Washington, D.C. There the Attorney General of the United States will deputize me as a special Federal Marshal, authorizing me to put an end to the illegal production of alcohol in these parts. I will then return here with a truck loaded with empty jugs, go to each still in these hills, and drain every last drop of alcohol into those jugs. Then I will go down into the valley and empty them into the river. Amen!…
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