Somebody’s Not Doing His Job

Columnist Erma Bombeck asked women for suggestions on how to terminate wars. Among the ideas that she received…

Put the Post Office in charge of the war. It might not stop it, but it certainly would slow it down.

Assign children to war zones and tell them they have to clear their rooms before they can go.

One woman suggested having “Hawkeye” (Alan Alda) present a TV marathon consisting of reruns of scenes in the operating tent from the M*A*S*H anti-war satire.

Alan alda, of course, is the popular actor best-known for his starring role in M*A*S*H. The series portrayed a strange situation. The action is situated right in the middle of a tremendous effort to kill, injure and destroy human life. Tens of thousands of young men and women are there to fight…to kill…and, if necessary, to be killed. Some of them are there because, somehow, they like being in the middle of a war. Others are there because they…