BAD CHOICES My all time favorite illustration concerns making the right choices: A man named Fred inherited a huge land grant, but the will provided that he could choose land in either Chile or Brazil.…
Sermon Illustrations
ELEPHANTS REMEMBER A man who owned an elephant offered a standing bet that no one could force his elephant to kneel and for a long time many people tried, but no one was able to…
ECONOMIC LAWS The First Law of Economists: For every economist, there exists an equal and opposite economist. The Second Law of Economists: They are both wrong.
NO SLEEP FROM ECONOMICS Two government economists were returning home from a field meeting. As with all government travelers, they were assigned the cheapest seats on the plane so they each were occupying the center…
24 HOUR BANKS You have seen the signs that say: "24-HOUR BANKING." But who has that long to stand in line at the bank?
WITH TWO PENNIES Mary Jo Tulley writes that when she was a child, her family lived from payday to payday. Her mother would wait until her father returned on payday before she could purchase the…
BURIED IN A TUXEDO There was once a farmer who decided to retire, but he did not have enough land for his two sons to farm. So while one son stayed at home to farm,…
WEALTH OR HEALTH Many people spend their health for wealth, and then try to spend their wealth for health.
The Internal Revenue Service has what it takes to take what you've got!
The lottery is a tax on people who are bad at math.
COST OF MARRIAGE A boy asked his father, "Dad, how much does it cost to get married?" Without hesitation, the father answered: "How should I know; I'm not done paying for it yet."
ECONOMIC CONTRADICTIONS The field of economics is the only discipline in which two people can share a Nobel Prize for holding to two contradictory theories.
GOD RINSES The church youth group was sponsoring a one day car wash to raise money to pay for a missions trip. They made a large sign: CAR WASH FOR YOUTH CHOIR TRIP! On the…
FISHING TIME & CONDITIONS From B.A.S.S. MAIL on the TNN Network's The Bassmasters, a man wrote to the television show with the question, "How can I become a professional fisherman?" The answer to his question…
CATTLE COMMITMENT It takes 3,000 cows to provide the leather for the 22,000 footballs used by the National Football League every year. We often don't think about the details and commitment required to produce the…
PRACTICAL PHILOSOPHY The next time someone asks you what you are thinking, just tell that person you were wondering why banks put Braille dots on the keypads of their drive-up ATMs? Answers like that will…
PSYCHIATRIC LANDLORD A neurotic is one who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is one who lives in it. A psychiatrist is the one who collects the rent.
BUMR STICKER WISDOM God loves a cheerful giver, But he will also take money from a grouch.
ECONOMIC LIGHT BULBS Q: How many economists does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. If the light bulb needs changed, then the market will change it.
1040 SPLIT Q: Why does the Internal Revenue Service call their tax form the 1040? A: Because for every $50 a worker earns, the worker gets 10 and the IRS gets 40.
