HOW AMERICA HANDLES STRESS 75% turn on the TV. 66% listen to music 61% take a bath or hot shower. 55% of women clean house (vs. 20% of men). 54% of women go shopping (vs.…
Sermon Illustrations
FATHER, SON, & SPIRIT If Father points to ultimate reality and Son supplies the clue to the divine mystery, Spirit epitomizes the nearness of the power and presence of God. From Flame of Love, by…
SHORT BIBLE MEN The three shortest men in the Bible were: KNEE-HIGH-MY-A (Nehemiah) BILDAD THE SHOE HEIGHT (Bildad the Shuhite) and the centurion who slept on his watch!
WORK SATISFIES Look at a day when you are supremely satisfied at the end. It's not a day when you lounge around doing nothing. It's when you've had everything to do and you've done it.…
MARITAL MASTERY It has been said (mostly by men) that marriage is when a man loses his bachelor's degree and a woman gets her master's degree.
TOO MANY LAWYERS When there are too many policemen, there can be no liberty; When there are too many soldiers, there can be no peace; When there are too many lawyers, there can be no…
FAST DADS Three boys were bragging about the speed of their fathers. One boy told the other two that his father was so fast he could throw a ball across the lake, run to the…
ECONOMIC LIGHT BULBS Q: How many economists does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. If the light bulb needs changed, then the market will change it.
BUMR STICKER WISDOM God loves a cheerful giver, But he will also take money from a grouch.
LIES & TRUTH A lie has speed, but truth has endurance. -- Edgar Mohn
GOLDFISH PRISON Gladys was a little girl of about seven. One day at the county fair, she won a goldfish. She took it home in its little round bowl. Day by day, she fed and…
NATIVE AMERICANS WERE SMARTER Watching a western show on television, a farm boy asked his father, "Was the white man really smarter than the Native American Indian?" The father answered: "Son, when the Indians ran…
EFFECTS OF LAZINESS A local grammar school pupil, when asked by the teacher to write a composition of "The Effects of Laziness," turned in a blank sheet of paper.
QUESTION OF DEGREES The college graduate with a degree in science asks, "Why does it work?" The college graduate with a degree in engineering asks, "How does it work?" The college graduate with a degree…
PSYCHIATRIC LANDLORD A neurotic is one who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is one who lives in it. A psychiatrist is the one who collects the rent.
SUCCESS IS NO SECRET There's no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn't tell you about it? -- Kin Hubbard
Acceptance | Bugs | Change | Ethnicity | Humor | Ideas | Names | Pests | Rejection | Roaches | Shame
ROACH WITHOUT A COUNTRY The cockroach that Americans call the German Roach also populates the homes of the Germans, but the Germans do not know it as the German Roach. The Germans call the same…
BASKETBALL PROPOSAL They were both in college and had been dating for a while. He asked her to go to a basketball game with him. This was her first game, so he was telling her…
RABBI'S HAM AT THE PRIEST'S WEDDING A Catholic priest and a Jewish rabbi were sitting together at a banquet. The priest asked the rabbi, "Tell me, when are you going to break down and eat…
NATIONAL PARK QUESTIONS These are questions that people actually asked of Park Rangers around the country, proving once again that there is no known limit to the depths of human stupidity. From the May of…
