PRACTICAL PROVERBS If you have a soft voice, you don't need a big stick. Be careful the words that you say, keep them soft and sweet. You never know from day to day which ones…
Sermon Illustrations
HEAVEN'S ETERNITY WARD In the comic "The Family Circus" by Bil Keane, two small children in the back seat of the car are looking at a hospital as they pass by. The little sister explains…
A CAR LIKE THAT A Texan drove into a gas station in the hills of Tennessee. He was wearing a big ten-gallon hat and fancy cowboy boots; he had diamond rings on both hands and…
A BEAUTIFUL FINISH Did you hear about the man who swallowed a quart of varnish? They say he had a beautiful finish. Adapted from "Tool Time Tim Taylor" (Tim Allen) of the television show "Home…
COMPLETE FORGIVENESS In teaching my boys, ages four and three, the Lord's Prayer, I was startled to hear my oldest boy say "As we forgive those who pass gas against us."
GOD DOES NOT BLABBER A drunken man stumbled out of a bar and happened to bump into his pastor who was walking down the street. The man apologized, "I never meant for you to see…
DOUBLE STANDARDS If you copy anything out of one book, it is plagiarism. If you copy it out of two books, it is research. If you copy it out of six books, you are a…
THAT ONE MUSEUM I wonder where that museum is that has all the arms and legs from the statues from all the other museums...
24 HOUR BANKS You have seen the signs that say: "24-HOUR BANKING." But who has that long to stand in line at the bank?
PRESIDENTIAL PIG TRADE President Clinton returned after a visit from Arkansas carrying two baby pigs. A reporter said to Clinton, "Those are great looking pigs you have there." The President thanked the reporter and said,…
SMALLER DOLLS David Ogilvy of the advertising agency Ogilvy and Mather would give each of his new managers a Russian doll. Each doll held a progressively smaller dolls. A note inside the smallest doll said,…
PRINCIPLE OR STYLE In matter of principle, stand like a rock; in matters of taste, swim with the current. -- Thomas Jefferson Taken from a Celestial Seasonings tea cup. Maybe this one is your cup…
JOBS BOARD As our economy continues to worsen and the unemployment situation follows, we are finding that there are a number of people in our church that are out of work that we are not…
I WISH CARDS I believe that one of the greatest challenges in church ministry today is for us to establish and maintain adequate channels of communication between leadership and the flock, so that we can…
ETHICAL QUESTIONS The Book of Questions, 1985 best seller, by Dr. Gregory Stock contains 267 questions that make you think. Here are a few: If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to…
NOT HE-MAN Four-year-old Jeremy, son of one of the members of our church congregation, had just become a Christian. Jeremy was going with his mother to get his picture taken at a store. As good…
CUCKOO CLOCK ACCOMPLISHMENTS In Italy, for thirty years under the Borgias, they had warfare terror murder and bloodshed, but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and the Renaissance. In Switzerland they had brotherly love, they…
CHARACTERISTICS OF LIGHT Scientists tell us that light sometimes acts like it contains particles (electrons). Sometimes it acts like pure energy (microwaves). Sometimes it has characteristics of both. We are forced to admit that light…
NO SLEEP FROM ECONOMICS Two government economists were returning home from a field meeting. As with all government travelers, they were assigned the cheapest seats on the plane so they each were occupying the center…
NEW WAY TO GOLF I haven't played golf in a while, but I remember some earlier years when I enjoyed the game and the fellowship it afforded me with some other pastors. Many men find…
