YOU KNOW YOU’RE GETTING OLDER WHEN
Everything hurts, and what doesn’t hurt, doesn’t work. The gleam in your eyes is from the sun hitting your bifocals. You feel like the night before, and you haven’t been anywhere. Your little black book contains only names ending in M.D. You get winded playing chess. Your children begin to look middle-aged. You join a health club, and don’t go. You decide to procrastinate, but never get around to it. Your mind makes contracts your body can’t meet. You know all the answers, but nobody asks you the questions. You look forward to a dull evening at home. You’re turning out lights for economic rather than romantic reasons. Your knees buckle and your belt won’t. The best part of your day is over when the alarm goes off. Your back goes out more than you do. A fortune teller offers to read your face. The little gray-haired lady you help across the street is your wife. You’ve got…
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