SORTS OF INTELLIGENCE I pride myself on being intelligent, but you have no idea how stupid I can be in some areas. I could have lived a thousand years and not devised the first bridge,…
Sermon Illustrations
TOO MANY CHURCH FRIENDS First Church was planning an evangelistic crusade. The pastor, wanting to win as many souls as possible, pleased with his people to bring their unsaved friends and neighbors to the services.…
THE WRONG WRIGHT In 1870, the Methodists in Indiana were having their Annual Conference. At one point in the proceedings, the president of the college where they were meeting said: "I think we're living in…
MY NAME IS GOSSIP My name is Gossip. I have no respect for justice. I maim without killing. I break hearts and ruin lives. I am cunning and malicious, and gather strength with age. The…
KEYHOLE THEOLOGY That is the trouble with keyholes. You don't always see enough to come to a conclusion, but once you've seen a little it's difficult to resist trying. This mistake is the essence of…
LISTEN TO THE LORD My child, You come seeking Me; Desiring confirmation That I am near. You shall find Me In the faces Of those I call you to serve, I am the one You…
WEAK MARRIAGES LACK FRIENDSHIP It is not lack of love but lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages. Philosopher Friederich Nietzsche (Pronounced: KNEE-CHE)
PASSION AND CONTROL Passion is the mob of the man that commits a riot upon his reason. By William Penn
CATHOLIC RAFFLES At the Friar's Club in New York City, Fr. John Catoir, who was the director of the Christophers, sat next to the comedian, Henny Youngman. Henny Youngman told him, "I did a show…
FULL- TIME CHARACTER "One's character is made up of what he does when nobody is looking." Abigail Van Buren, from Quote, Vol. 85, No. 13, July 1, 1985, page 195
A CALL TO HUMILITY In his Serious Call, William Law exhorts: Let every day be a day of humility; condescend to all the weaknesses and infirmities of your fellow-creatures, cover their frailties, love their excellencies,…
AGREEABLE KISSES When you are able to see EYE to EYE with the one you love, You will finally be able to get a good kiss! By Michael E. Hodgin
STANDING ROOM ONLY Those who are too concerned about the overpopulation of the earth have no reason to worry. Eventually there will be standing room only. At that point, births will decrease dramatically.
TOO MANY CREATORS Those who are amazed that God could create the earth in six days seem to have forgotten that He did not have theologians, politicians and lawyers around to complicate the process.
THE HIRING PARTY Dad was watching television after supper. Mom was doing dishes while another load of clothes were in the washing machine. The children were in the den looking at pictures from the family…
HE WON'T TAKE THE BALL It seems that a fellow named Calhoun was the favorite ball carrier of the local fans, but on this particular day the quarterback was not giving him the ball. As…
JUST TO BE SURE As we returned from Vacation Bible School one summer day, my young daughter Melissa asked if we could stop at the library. When I asked her why, she explained, "This morning…
THE TEACHER HAS NO MORALS A kindergarten teacher was suddenly taken ill and a replacement was hastily found. The substitute teacher was at a loss as to what to do with the children. She decided…
WHAT ELEPHANTS? A great religious leader was teaching his followers in the jungles of India. Devotees from around the world came to hear his teaching. He taught that which most people considered reality was only…
FAIR EXCHANGES The husband's idea of a gift exchange: His gift is a new set of golf clubs Her gift is a new pair of dishwashing gloves... The wife's idea of a gift exchange: His…
