WHAT COMPUTERS DO Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done. -- Andy Rooney
Sermon Illustrations
GUARDIAN ANGEL I 'm not sure of the year, but this is a true story from my life growing up on a small "truck-farm" in northern Illinois. My Dad was out cultivating on the "20-acres,"…
Appearance | Appearances | Children | Humor | Miracles | Perceptions | Pets | Prayer | Understanding
CAT FROM HEAVEN Dwight Nelson recently told a true story about a pastor. He had a kitten that climbed up a tree in his backyard and then was afraid to come down. The pastor coaxed,…
HELPED HIM CRY Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child. The winner was a four-year-old…
IGNORED WARNINGS Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, the teacher stopped to gently reprove the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday School teacher said, "Son, when I was a child,…
PERSONAL GOD WITHOUT COMMITMENT Quoting Wade Clark Roof's book, Spiritual Marketplace: Baby Boomers and the Remaking of American Religion he writes: "Roof comes up with five varieties of religious or spiritual types: Secularists, those who…
COMPETITIVE ADVANTAGE A lesson in "heart" is my little, ten-year-old daughter, Sarah, who was born with a muscle missing in her foot and wears a brace all the time. She came home one beautiful spring…
FORGIVENESS FOR A MURDER Karla Faye Tucker was executed on February 3, 1998 for a pickax murder. One of the ones that lost a sister to her tells this story: "When I got to the…
MEMORY TECHNIQUE The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. From Steve Morrison
CONSEQUENCE OF CREDIT Credit Card: A device that allows you to buy something you don't need at a price you can't afford with money you don't have to impress people you don't like. From Bruce…
WASTED SOLICITATION Return to sender. "you must be morons to send me this letter!" Bernard Lewinsky wrote on the envelope to the Clinton Legal Expense Trust after the Trust inadvertently solicited Monica's father for a…
SPELL GRACE & LIVE After a very long illness, a woman died and arrived at the Gates of Heaven. While she was waiting for Saint Peter to greet her, she peeked through the Gates. She…
SHORT-TERM PLANS East Canton, OHIO (AP) -- Dick Alexander knows where he's going when he dies: right into the coffin he's fashioned for himself. Concerned about burdening his family with the casket's cost, Alexander spent…
GOLDEN OLDIES A Finnish academic known for recording Elvis Presley songs in Latin is planning a new record of eternal hits - this time in the ancient Sumerian language. Jukka Ammondt has been practicing with…
JOB THOUGHTS Things you wish you could say at work: I don't know what your problem is, but I bet it's hard to pronounce. How about never? Is never good for you? I'll try being…
NO-RISK LOANS A banker is a person who is willing to make a loan if you present sufficient evidence to show you don't need it. From Bruce Anderson
AMAP The interviewer examined the job application then turned to the prospective employee. "I see you have put ASAP down for the date you are available to start, meaning "as soon as possible," of course.…
SHARED BLAME Husband and wife were playing in the mixed foursomes. He hit a great drive down the middle - she sliced the second shot into a copse of trees. Unfazed, he played a brilliant…
MATHEMATICAL MIRACLE Moses and the people were in the desert, but what was he going to do with them? They had to be fed, and feeding 2 or 3 million people requires a lot of…
KENTUCKY JELLY A nurse caring for a woman from Kentucky asked, "So how's your breakfast this morning?" "It's very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't get used to the taste," the patient replied.…
