MODELS & CRITICS Children have more need of models than of critics. From Things Your Dad Always Told You But You Didn't Want to Hear, by Carolyn Coats
Sermon Illustrations
WHISTLER'S MOTHER'S TELEVISION A kindergarten tot described the painting, "Whistler's Mother" as follows: "The painting shows this nice old lady who is waiting for the repairman to bring back her TV set."
SAVE IT FOR DAD Small boy to his mother: "Don't yell at me; I am not your husband."
ALLOWANCE INFLATION "I don't mind that my son is earning more than I did on my first job. What disturbs me is that he's six and it's his allowance." From Better Families
DOES IT WORK? Man talking about his wife: "Once in a while my wife goes to a health and beauty spa to pamper herself. While she's there she puts on one of those mud packs."…
ONLY ONE IDEAL MARRIAGE Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married -- and she didn't have to hear about the way his…
IDEAL WAITS FOR IDEAL When I was a young man I vowed never to marry until I found the ideal woman. Well, I found her -- but, alas, she was waiting for the ideal man.…
HUSBAND PRESERVATION The Chicago Tribune, on October 1, 1994, reprinted a letter to Ann Landers that included a recipe called "How to Preserve a Husband." Here's a copy for those looking for a new dish:…
BOYS VIEW GIRLS Here is a boy's description of girls -- misspelling and all -- that Mark Twain had received from a teacher who submitted to him a collection of students' answers to a series…
FREE AS A CHICKEN Some parents would like to be as carefree as chickens on a modern chicken farm. The chickens have all the fun of laying eggs and none of the bother of raising…
ABANDONMENT OF MARRIAGE A marriage is not a joining of two worlds, but an abandoning of two worlds in order that one new one might be formed. From The Mystery of Marriage, by Mike Mason,…
GRANDMA'S ADVICE Grandma had been sitting quietly in the back seat, but now she spoke up: "I told them Constable, that we would never get far in a stolen car."
MARRIAGE IS RELATIVE An eight year old boy asked his girlfriend to marry him. She turned him down, saying that in her family only relatives married. She explained, "If you and me were relatives we…
FEMINIST TRANSFORMATIONS Some of us are becoming the men we want to marry. Gloria Steinem in Ms. We have used the following story, but this one is different. It has a different ending, and it…
POPULAR COUNSELOR A couple with marital problems went to a counselor to see what could be done to repair their marriage. The wife began to sob uncontrollably as she poured out her heart. Suddenly the…
LOVE, IMAGINATION, & INTELLIGENCE Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. H.L. Mencken
CHILDISH DEMONSTRATIONS Witzing's Observation: Any shy, introverted child will choose a crowded public area to loudly demonstrate any newly acquired shocking vocabulary.
SEX AS THE BASIS OF MARRIAGE Sex is a good basis for a marriage if you can agree on what to do for the next 23 hours and 45 minutes. From the Chicago Tribune, September…
SEXUALITY CONTRASTS Letter One: I met him; I liked him. I liked him; I loved him. I loved him; I let him. I let him; I lost him." Letter Two: I saw her. I liked…
SEX AND THE SOUL Nobody can really do what the prostitute and her customer try; nobody can go to bed with someone and leave his soul parked outside. Lewis Smedes, Sex for Christians
