Humor Archives - Page 59 of 167

Complain | Criticism | Criticize | Humor | Negative | People | Short Shorts

CRITICISM Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People

Advertise | Bargain | Deceit | Humor | Money | Protection | Sales | Value

THE COST OF BEING FREE The warranty on a new color TV set had no sooner run out than the set started causing trouble. The lady of the house called

Create | Guidance | Humor | Instruction | Knowledge | Read | Success | Think | Wisdom

IT TAKES A THINKER TO TINKER After several hours of trying to put a newly purchased gadget together according to the instruction sheet, the buyer, in desperation, took it down

Communication | Gossip | Humor | Speech | Talk | Warning

SHARKS DON’T HAVE TONGUES Last night, briefly, I saw the end of the film “Jaws” on the television. Did you ever see the film? You know, I do think that

Answer | Blessing | Greed | Honor | Humor | Logic | Patience | Prayer | Wait

GOD ANSWERS IN A SECOND One day a man asked, “Jehovah, how long is a thousand years to you?” The eternal one answered with a blink, “Just a second.” “Lord,”

Blessing | Evangelism | Guidance | Humor | Life | Witness

A GOOD CHAPTER OF LIFE My church has begun using the Evangelism Explosion visitation program. During one visit in which I was giving the presentation, something happened that gave new

Golf | Health | Heart | Humor | Leisure | Sports | Understanding | Warning

TOO MANY GOLF STROKES “Uff-da, Hans! Golfing must be bad for da heart,” remarked Hilda. “Vat makes yew say dat?” asked Hans. “Vell,” replied Hilda, “I yust heard a golfer

Communicate | Consequence | Deceit | Humor | Opportunity | Perceptions | Perspective | Understanding

FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION After World War II, a general and his young lieutenant were on a train in England. When they got on, the only seats left were across from

Coffee | Communication | Desire | Heaven | Humor | Perspective | Understanding

DON’T FORGET THE COFFEE A new stewardess was making her first flight on a full plane out of Denver. The pilots made their routine announcements and forgot to turn of

Age | Aging | Humor | Opportunity | Purpose | Respect | Responsibility | Service | Soldier | War

LET OUR SENIORS BE USEFUL My wife and I took our grandchildren to visit my parents in Missouri. When we were ready to leave, my dad gave me a picture

Age | Church | Communication | Grades | Humor | Knowledge | Student | Understanding

CHURCH FOR GOOD STUDENTS One of the regular Monday morning assignments for our education secretary was to scan the previous day’s visitor cards to determine local prospects. Our church was

Church | Evangelism | Humor | Ministry | Outreach | Relevance | Vision

DINOSAURS Dinosaurs?/They’re all extinct, I think. I want to cry, I don’t know why The bruisers died! Perhaps because their six-ounce brains Were way back in their bony tails. They

Advise | Depression | Discouragement | Excuses | Humor | Understanding

DEFECTIVE CLOUD One day Charlie Brown is seated at Lucy’s Psychiatric Help booth, where he has been pouring out his story. He says to Lucy, “And I remember what you

Attendance | Fear | Freedom | Humor | Obedience | Reasons | Reluctance | Responsibility

NO FREEDOM: YOU HAVE TO GO! A mother was having a hard time getting her son to attend school one morning. “Nobody likes me at school,” said the son. “The

Age | Child | Children | Freedom | Graduation | Humor | Perspective | Understanding

FREE OR FOUR A jubilant seminary graduate shouted, “I’m free! I’m free!” He was answered by his unimpressed son, “So what, I’m four!”

Business | Desire | Freedom | Humor | Labor | Perfectionism | Purpose | Stewardship | Work

SPELL OR SELL A newly-hired traveling salesman wrote his first report to the home office. It stunned the executives in the sales department because it was obvious that the “new

Bible Knowledge | Bible Study | Children | Communication | Failure | Humor | Knowledge | Truth | Weakness

NOT JOHNNY’S FAULT The new pastor dropped in on the first grade Sunday School Class. “Tell me, he said, who was responsible for the walls of Jericho falling?” After a

Bondage | Freedom | Humor | Law | Price | Short Shorts | Sin | Speech

THOUGHTS ON FREEDOM The following are a few collected thoughts on freedom: Men fight for freedom and then start making laws to get rid of it. If all men are

Burden | Desire | Friendship | Humor | Loneliness | Planning | Purpose | Relationships

POOF GOES THE FRIENDSHIP One day, as the rancher walked along the beach with the others, he discovered an ancient lamp. And when he rubbed it, a genie sprang forth.

Activity | Child | Children | Church | Humor | Motivation | Sermon | Time | Worship

SERMON COUNT My young son asked what was the highest number I had ever counted to. I didn’t know but asked about his highest number. It was “537”. “Oh,” I