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CREATIVE LEVITY The compulsion to take ourselves seriously is in inverse proportion to our creative capacity. Eric Hoffer
Sermon Illustrations
WHY JESUS WALKED ON WATER A Scotsman was traveling in the Holy Land on a vacation when he came to the sea of Galilee. Inquiring the price of a pleasure boat in which he might…
DOCTORS, PROFESSORS & MECHANICS A professor watched while a mechanic removed engine parts from his car to get to the valves. A surgeon waiting for his car being repaired walked over to observe the process.…
KICK IT DOWN OR BUILD Any donkey can kick down a barn, but it takes a good carpenter to build one. -- Sam Rayburn
NEVER LEAVE YOUR SPOUSE One of the Ten Commandments of Marriage should be: "Never threaten to leave." This threat creates cracks in the commitment, erodes the security of total acceptance, and fuels fear. In addition,…
SAFE FALL Question: How can you fall off of a thirty-foot ladder and not get hurt? Answer: Make sure you fall off the first rung.
THROWING PEANUTS Three boys came to confession. The first ended by saying ". . . and I threw peanuts in the river." He was scolded for wasting good food. The second boy came in and…
THREE KICK RULE Johnny Cochran decides to go duck hunting in Texas. He's having a great time when suddenly a duck flies overhead. Johnny fires a shot and drops the bird, but it falls into…
BOTH PIECES OF PIE A boy brought a friend over for supper. His friend seemed to enjoy the food all right, even though his mother was not the best cook around. Then it came time…
MYSTERIOUS MARRIAGE DECISION Marriage is the mysterious decision by a woman to give up the attention of many men for the inattention of one man.
SIZE OF GRIEF Herb Gelfand wrote about the death of his granddaughter Melanie: "There's an old saying that everything begins life tiny in size, like a seed, and grows larger in time - except grief.…
TWO RED EARS A common-sense-challenged man with two red ears went to see the doctor. The doctor asked him what had happened to his ears; it looked like they were burnt. The common-sense-challenged man explained,…
HOW WE MEET TRIALS Nothing shows more accurately what we are, than the way we meet trials and difficulties. Source unknown
SYMPATHETIC VIBRATIONS Soldiers throughout history have known about sympathetic vibrations, as have certain opera singers like Caruso and jazz musicians like Ella Fitzgerald. Before soldiers cross a bridge, they break step. Why? Because their cadence…
DIFFERENT NAME FOR SIN Abraham Lincoln once asked one of his critics, "How many legs does a cow have?" "Four" was the reply. "If you call her tail a leg, how many does she have?"…
HIT HIM WITH A BAT Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.
SOURCE OF STRESS If you have ever struggled with a diet, then you probably know that STRESSED is just DESSERTS spelled backwards. Michael Hodgin
LOOKING FOR A GUN A woman went to a gun shop and told the clerk: "I'm looking for a gun for my husband." The clerk asked the woman: "Did your husband tell you what kind…
PAST OUR PERCEPTIONS We are like flies that crawl across the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel. We cannot see what angels and gods lie underneath the threshold of our perception. William I. Thompson
PRAYER OR SWEAR A nun was stranded on the side of the road trying to change her flat tire with a jack that did not fit the car correctly. A motorist saw her distress and…
